Urgent.

Shrieking for attention among the never to be read was an email marked: URGENT. 

I sighed.

It had been a long year.

What on earth could be URGENT at this time of the year?

I thought I had better read it.

It referred to another mail left unread.

It was laced with threats of exclusion, excommunication, exfoliation, extermination.

My stress levels rose momentarily.

I sighed.

I thought I had better read the unread.

After much searching and filtering I read the aforesaid unread.

I understood very little.

I sighed.

Attached was an Excel file, and three other documents.

It was URGENT.

I understood very little.

There was line after line of arcane, I assumed academic, acronyms.

I sighed.

It has been a long year.

I texted a friend.

She wasn't sure either.

But it was URGENT.

I plumped for the line beginning: ACLN 2015.

I typed 2 in the cell.

I saved the file.

I attached it in response to the mail with the stressful threats.

I clicked on send.

I hoped for the best.

A reply arrived.

"Thank you Simon."

I didn't really understand what I had done.
It appeared that 2 was an acceptable answer.

A bridge too far.

The cost of education

Is unsinkable not unthinkable?

The terrible thing about maritime experiential learning is that people may realise at their peril why worse things tend to happen at sea.

Unsaved souls may or may not take solace in the fact that thanks to them there are now sufficient life-boats.

We think of those at peril on the sea.

Learning is limited by interests.

Theoretical learning.

Is theoretical learning for those who live on higher land?

Reduced ice-berg counts are no compensation for the potentially dire consequences of global warming on countries situated on land lower than sea-level.

We think of those at peril from the sea.

Bangladesh seems like a long way away.

Learning is limited by interests.

Statistics, damned statistics and lies.

Statistics which demonstrate that road accidents may well be more probable than bridge accidents are of little comfort to those unfortunate casualties of 'freak' navigation errors.

Costa cruises may still be profitable?

Crew from Bangladesh still have safe (badly paid) employment and a better chance than their compatriots of keeping their feet dry.

Is theoretical learning for those who live on higher land?

Secrets of 'defence' may prevent Breton trawlermen discovering when they catch a Royal Navy submarine...

Such secrecy limits victims' learning outcomes and enables easier 'legal' defence.

Must the Navy not protect Britain's fishy business?

Nelson defeats the French (again).

Learning is limited by interests.

Bridges to learning.

The Forth Bridge still takes too long to paint. 

Was the Fifth Bridge built in concrete?

The Severn Bridge is not spelt wrong.

Is learning correct spelling not in the nation's interests?

Learning is limited by interests.

This short shipwreck of a blog was inspired by @nomadwarmachine, @timbuckteeth and @amyburvall.

Face values.

"So this year there were 224 candidates, 78 who didn't complete the year,  94 passes, and 52 fails.

The average mark for the year was 11.58 - that's 0,4 up on last year.  Well done!"

Anybody got anything to add? 

Well that's another year done and dusted, bar the second sessions. Thank goodness that's all over.

Marked for life

The English teacher handed me back another double-sided piece of paper.  We had gone through the motions, I had done what was demanded, she had marked her customary  '14/20 quite good', that  I noted vaguely. Paper, scrawl, paper, stamp, school bell, day done.

Serious Science 

I have absolutely no memory of any mark in chemistry. I remember the bunsen burners we were not allowed to touch, that the chemistry laboratory smelt bad.  I never really realised that science was serious stuff.

Science and comedy

There was the day that the chemistry teacher wanted to demonstrate how sodium reacts with water....

Now that I remember.  We all trudged out to the sea-wall.  He donned a science-fiction-inspired scientific mask, heavy gloves, and a scruffy white coat.

At the call of three, eyes-wide with excitement and a certain apprehension, we ducked behind the sea-wall.

Dramatically, Mr Slightly Nervous but ultimately Pretty Brave Chemistry Teacher (no memory for names) lobbed the aforesaid chemical substance into the sea.

Rather than the excitement of a fantastic explosion we got phizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.(2 minutes)......phut.

A scientific masterpiece.  His sophisticated mask did nothing to hide his embarrassment.

Face values

So what shall I retain from the cohort of students from 2013-14?  Will it be their marks?  Their scientific progress?  The agreeable blip they made in the data?

I think not.

There are moments, anecdotes, events, creations, which come back to me now. In this instance I can see expressions of emotion on their faces:

• They have just made their first movie, their friends are crowding around a tablet trying to glimpse their comic performances captured for posterity.  

• They are singing a self-taught Christmas Carol, their faces are lit up with joy. 

• They are standing,  as a group on the top of a mountain, complete strangers, foreigners, three days earlier, beaming as one into a Chinese student's camera. 

• They are completely engaged in conversation with a surprise visitor from the United Kingdom.

• They are captured over-coming their difficulties to imagine a project playing with a pile of Lego bricks.

• They are learning to dance hip hop with one of the students who has revealed himself to be an acrobatic expert. They are overcoming their embarrassment with gentle cajoling from the dancer.

These are not numbers, these are recognisably people I know.

Science Fiction.

0.4 above average! Lies, statistics and damned life in all that?

Numbers, tables and charts mean nothing to me.

I prefer real face values which really mark me.